Month #31: Coping, Getting Away, and Coming Home

Dear Aidan,

The reality of Kung-Kung's illness has started to sink in. But Mama hasn't been able to sit down to dwell much on how serious his condition is. On one hand, Mama's time has been divided between looking after you and researching on pancreatic cancer. On another, my mind has been preoccupied with questions and conundrums. For example, we have to figure a way out to be there for him and Poh-Poh without disrupting your life too much. After all, we may have to move back to Kuala Lumpur for a while; what will happen to your schooling here then? How will I also look after you and yet drive Kung-Kung to and from the hospital and run errands for Poh-Poh? Aunty E.E, your nanny is in the midst of moving to Klang, a good hour away from Cheras, so it wouldn't be nice to bother her with babysitting you on the days when Mama's extra busy.

It's a month of flux, dilemmas and uncertainty for sure and we must be calm in order to do things right. I'm mainly talking about myself, I suppose. Mama isn't very good at multi-tasking unlike most women. The good news is, we've booked our flights back to KL.

Kung-Kung's explaining to Papa that the bushes are strictly to be left alone...

It's funny how even as these troubles are coming to taint our life, new friendships bloom. At the airport waiting lounge, while you were playing at the little indoor playground, a little girl joined you and the two of you played quite well together. Mama finally spoke to her mummy and discovered that she was from BBGS (Mama's school) too. It turns out Aunty Po Li's a year Mama's junior and we're all on the same flight back to KL. We exchanged numbers and then on the flight, you wanted to sit next to Jadyn, so Mama took you to her seat and she offered you a little char siew pastry. Later, when we touched down, you followed her and her parents about and decided to hold her hand. Looks like, you've made a new friend!

A new friend, Mama!

When we flew back, it was good to see that Kung-Kung was in relatively good spirits. His abdomen looked a little bloated now. But he said the discomfort was bearable. Chemotherapy to kill the cancer cells had started and Uncle Khin had shuttled him to the hospital last week when he was up to help. 

We spent what would've been our week-long Bali trip together in Cheras, helping Kung-Kung and Poh-Poh around the house and driving Kung-Kung for another session of chemotherapy.

Ah, a hard-day's work, completed!

Ok, where can I hide this?

I must say that you've been on your best behaviour on this trip, despite the constant moving about. It's not easy for a 2 year old to adjust to such changes, so Mama and Papa are really proud of you.

In fact, it was really nice to see you do your part too when we mowed the lawn for Kung-Kung one evening. 

You helped place the cut grass into the bin bags and even tried your hand at raking them. At least until you decided to do some grass-mound-hopping.

At night, after dinner, you and Papa helped with the dishes while Mama mopped the floor or washed your clothes. Of course, half the time, you put a little too much detergent on the plates and cutlery and Papa had to rinse them quite a bit.

Papa: Whoa, enough detergent there, honey
Aidan: No-o-o, Papa. We need more...

Aunty Katy (Kung-Kung's sister) also dropped by for a visit with Uncle Felix (Aunty Katy's husband), Uncle Andrew (brother) and Aunty Wai Kuen (Uncle Andrew's partner). She taught me some hei gung moves that could help Kung-Kung take in more oxygen as the cancer cells apparently hate oxygen. The next day, Mama showed Kung-Kung the moves. It doesn't look like he's very keen on doing too many things as he's already spending 40 minutes every day just on breathing exercises. Meanwhile, poor Poh-Poh is in a military, get-it-done mode. Sometimes, people become this way to cope with fear. I'm sure she's trying not to panic by burying herself in service.

Love Kung-Kung

Love Poh-Poh, too!

One afternoon, we decided to take you out for lunch as you'd been cooped up in the house for too long.  We had lovely Japanese food at Mizu, Bangsar Village. You really love a good, simple bowl of soupy udon noodles so we ordered that and some teriyaki chicken for you which also slurped up. It's nice for Mama to see that you and Papa are getting close. I must admit that it has been tough for Papa to have you insist on Mama doing things for you.

When we got back to Singapore, Mama had to sort out a nasty bacterial rash on your back. Dr. Angela reckons you could've caught the bugs in the communal paddle-pool at your school. Thank goodness for Foban which Dr. Anglea prescribed. It takes time to work but I can see that the rash has stopped spreading.

I'm liking this big, wooden bench, Papa

Mama, I feel embarrassed

To cheer you from the misery of the itch, we took a weekend off to spend at Sentosa Island. Papa decided that we all needed a nice, short break to ease the tension of what we were all going through.

In addition, we thought you might enjoy the Songs of the Sea light and fountain musical which actually takes place outdoors by the sea.

Upon arrival, we checked into the Movenpick Heritge Hotel for the night as rooms were on offer. While waiting for Papa to register, we did silly things around the lobby, like make faces at the shiny elevator doors to see our reflections.

My body says this ranks about 9/10...

The room we got was comfy. Papa was happy with the Nespresso machine while I just liked the look of the bed. I think you and I think alike because the first thing you did was dive onto it and lie down with your Chew-Chew.

We decided to lunch at the in-house restaurant and the food wasn't bad at all. You and Mama shared a noodle and we all had bites of your vanilla ice-cream for dessert.

Where's my ice-cream?

In a good mood, you started a conversation with the waitress about the Merlion and managed to tickle her with your quips.

Waitress: Can you see the Merlion?
Aidan: There! There are people in the mouth!
Waitress: Yes, you can go up too if you like to check out the view.
Aidan: No, thank you. If I go into the mouth, the Merlion will eat me!

Funny smiles now, Papa! 1, 2, 3...

After lunch, we returned to the room for a bath and a nap. (Well, you had to be coerced into having a nap but once you settled into bed, you were knocked out in minutes.)

In the late afternoon, we walked about to explore the artist's space beneath the Merlion (we didn't go up though). It was a special buskers' week and there were many funny mime artist as well as ventriloquist and magician shows to watch.

After catching a few performances, we had a dinner of fried rice and stir-fried vegetables at a colonial-looking restaurant up the hill. You seemed to like the morning glory because for the first time in my life (and yours), you actually asked Mama to cut you more vegetables! Let it not be a phase, Jesus!

It looks like the fish I eat in my porridge!

At about 8.30 pm, we got tickets for the tram ride to Siloso Beach to catch the musical at 9 pm. It started to drizzle so the show attendants gave out raincoats to the audience. I think you really enjoyed the colours and the drama of the light effects and fountains in different shapes.

That koh-koh must be getting very wet

Whoa, explosions! Bombs!

After it ended, we got some tit-bits from the 7-11 convenience store and took a tram back to our hotel. We decided to do some scribbles together lying on our tummies. And then you got up, walked to the phone and 'made a call to God' regarding Kung-Kung. It was a pretty sweet thing to do though we're not really sure you understood exactly what you were doing. Anyway, God works in mysterious ways. Cliched but true.

The next day, we spent 2 hours at Underwater World just looking at fishes, turtles, jellyfish, sharks and other undersea creatures. It was fun watching the deep-sea fish swimming overhead in the tunnel. We finished our visit with a sea lion and dolphin show. We then returned to the hotel, checked out and got home in time for Mass.

These are not for eating

Hey that toothy one keeps looking at us!

I know how to clap, too

Mr. Dolphin is such a good boy

Mama, jelly fish in Chinese is called...'sui mu'!

Last weekend, we finally met up with Lana's parents, too - Aunty Glenda and Uncle Ian. They had wanted to meet up ever since we passed Lana's birthday present through the teachers because we couldn't attend her party due to our trip back to KL.

She's from my school, Mama!

We had dinner at Nex and it was really fun because the conversation flowed naturally. You and Lana also exchanged toys quite easily. And on the train back, both of you had a giggly old time, pulling faces and hand actions.

Sing along now, Mama, Papa!

This month, Mama's been exploring numbers as well as small alphabets with you. You've got a bit of an antsy behind as you can't sit still or focus for more than 20 minutes. I guess that'll just have to do for now. Meanwhile, some single-story books Mama bought at a bargain book store while in Kuala Lumpur are Teddy's Red Nose and the Babe, the Flying Pig.

Along with a second-hand Bambi, these two books cost just RM7
(Only at Cheras Leisure Mall)

This is Not How You Make Friends, Aidan

Dear Aidan,

You're 2 and a half years old now and it's heartwarming to observe that you're interested in making friends. We're also real proud that you're gaining confidence in making the first move. Even with the bullies in the playground who are thrice your size. However, there are ways to initiate friendship. And there are also different types of kids out there. Some want to be friends. Others just want your toy. Still others just want you to be a practice block for their budding tae kwan do kicks. The girls need a softer approach. The boys don't mind the occasional lion roar in their face. The older kids play rougher. The younger ones can't kick a football quite just yet. So don't get mad just because you've got the makings of Wayne Rooney in your right leg. Before Mama lists down the ways to make friends, here's the list of what not to do. I know this takes the fun out of play-time but seriously, the objective's to have friends to grow up with, and learn from.  Not have kids running helter-skelter away from you because "Godzilla is going to kill us."

How Not to Make Friends:

1. Kiss boys even if you've had loads of fun and are happy with them. Only deep-sea boy squids do that to each other. And frogs. And some dragonflies. And lately, a few penguins.

2. Kick a ball at an 18-month-old and expect an unbroken volley. The little guy sees a flying projectile coming his way, he runs the opposite direction because he wants to live.

3. Tell a group of girls that Simba wants to borrow their pink scooters.

4. Tell a group of girls that Simba wants to borrow their meant-for-5-year-old pink scooters.

5. 'Block' another kid from looking at 'your worm' in the grass. Worms are public property and anyone can have a look, ok?

6. Attempt to jump onto any tike car, scooter, bicycle you see lying on the floor in the playground. These things have owners. And no, the owners are not all called Aidan John Pereira. 

7. Tell some kid to sit on a fountain just so you can watch the water spray turn into a gush. That's not called being friendly. That's called being bossy.

8. Ask some 11-year-old to play with you and expect him to. He's probably afraid he'll accidentally kill you.

9. Ask some bully with a large bat to play with you because he'd probably kill you and we wouldn't be sure if it was by accident or not. 

10. Ask the maids to watch you kick the ball 'so high' because you want an appreciative audience. They need to keep an eye on the kids under their care and you don't look like any of them.

11. Doing your own '1,2,3...get set go' because you take ages to say it right and the other kids just want to run.

Despite all this, I know you'll do fine. Because your little heart is trying to get to the right place. And I know I'm responsible for making that happen. It was nice the other day when you went up to Xe Min after she got tackled and hurt by a bully, and gave her a hug. And it's always amazing to hear you say "Cannnn!" in a sing-song voice when a kid wants to play with your ride-on toys or cart. It wasn't always this way, of course, but watching you develop these little skills as we grow together is just sublime. 

Oh one last thing: Licking the playground floor is also not how you make friends, honey. All the other kids tend to follow which just means their mums and maids could put you on the blacklist. That's a whole lot of kids not attending your future birthday parties, son!

The Month Eskimo Boy Hit 30 and Cancer Struck Kung-Kung

Dear Aidan,

You're 30 months old now. That was quick. Your tantrums are winding down, too. Which gives me the theory that you have a 6-month cycle in your life - 6 months, 1 year, 18 months, etc - whereby you go through emotional, mental and physical changes.

Sorry, Mama, I'm just not in the mood

Mr. Major Grumps turned up for the last time when we took you to the zoo again. Yup, the zoo seems to bring out the antsy and hairy side of you. Looking back, maybe you were generally nervous about the large animals even though you were genuinely interested in checking them out. I don't think you - like Mama - dig monkeys at all. You were pretty whiny and disagreeable when we went through the entire section. I wonder why though. After all, Papa's a bit of a big old gorilla.

Be careful, Papa, the elephant's going to eat your hand

This time round, we skipped the rhinos and flamingoes. We went back to the White Tigers and spent more time with the elephants, seeing as we missed them altogether at the last outing. We watched the Elephants at Work & Play Show and even fed them after it. We walked to the Phillip the Seal show and had a splashing good time. We then took a zoo tram and managed to visit the deer family, the giraffes, zebras and hippos without walking.

Phillip the Seal splashes the kids

Oh no, Papa, he's looking at us!

All in all, your favourite part of the visit was probably the ice-cream stop. How do we know that? You didn't say a word as you carefully and steadily polished off the half scoop Mama gave you.

Mmm...hmmm? Hmm-mmmm...hmm!

I need to patent this design, Mama

This month, you're beginning to display another level of independence and creativity. Your Plan Toys train tracks, for instance, look different every time you're done assembling them because you like to create your own version.

Aidan: Another round of lion king musical video, ok?
Papa: Zzzz...

Meanwhile, watching lion king musical videos on youtube has become an obsession since your outing to the actual broadway musical at the Marina Bay Sands Theatre. Nickelodeon? No thanks. Playhouse Disney? What's that? You've never really taken to TV except for Pororo the Penguin and the Mickey Mouse Club. But lion king musical? Bring it on!

I'm the target market, so I know what I'm doing, Papa

You're also proving to be Papa's and Mama's handy little helper. There's always some volunteering when Mama or Kakak is mopping or vacuuming. And on weekends, there's always a monopoly by you of the coffee and tea making facilities. When Papa started toddler-proofing the condo unit (with all that dashing about you do now) with some rubber buffers for the sharp corners, you decided to participate. No wait, you practically took over operations.

There are days when you get up to mischief and test Mama a few ways: (1) delay tactics during bedtime ("Mama, I need to say Goodnight to Papa one more time" or "One more story, just one more!") (2) chucking your soft toys onto the floor (3) running your colour pencils off the paper and onto the floor. Then there are days when you're quiet and deeply involved in the activity you're doing. And Mama gets the most unexpected answers from you when I try to spark off a conversation.

In terms of books, Mama decided to return to Popular Bookstore in Heartland Mall since you liked the last book I got. This time, I bought Sunny Farm as features animals and a simple story about teamwork. That's not all, though. Papa has also gotten into the habit of buying you lovely books with amazing illustrations like The Whale and the Snail.

What are Llamas, Mama? Are they like horses?

I want to be a snail, Mama

There has been devastating news this month. It involves Mama's daddy, i.e your Kung-Kung. Remember how he and Poh-Poh visited us in Singapore just a few weeks back? Anyway, he complained of indigestion when they returned to KL and owed it to the yummy foods they'd  been indulging in during the holiday.

He soon went to see Dr. Thong, our family doctor since 1980, to check it out. He was given some prescriptions for gas as the doctor found lots of it in Kung-Kung's tummy. When the discomfort didn't go away after a week, he was urged to get a scan at gastroenterologist's clinic. It turns out that Kung-Kung has pancreatic cancer. And it's already Stage 4, the worst stage to be in.

Mama and Uncle Khin had to fly back to KL to take Kung-Kung to the oncologist to hear the official news. The day we went to see the gastroenterologist was very difficult. The fact that Kung-Kung's such a timid, quiet and nice person didn't help. He took the sledgehammer the way he would for any news: steadily, matter-of-factly, calmly. Poh-Poh on the other hand, zoned out completely, as if it was the only way she could cope with terrible news.  When we were about to leave the room, Dr. Tan basically asked Uncle Khin and Mama to stay back; he then told us frankly that Kung-Kung's case would be quite straightforward. The pain would intensify quickly. And there wouldn't be much time for him to live. He advised us to start thinking about hospice care.

Deep inside, I was quite angry that the doctor was so clipped about the whole affair. Sure, pancreatic cancer is usually quite hopeless if categorised as Stage 4 as surgery is out of the question. But I felt he could at least suggest more alternatives. I suppose I should be grateful that he at least (1) pointed us to a surgeon next door to learn about conditions where it'd be possible for Kung-Kung to have surgery (2) gave us the contact for a really good oncologist at Sunway Medical Centre.

I don't know how to take all this, honey. Usually, people panic, cry and get really scared because such news normally means death. I've not had the time nor stillness to fully absorb the news. But as I write this, I can already feel a sense of loss even as a sense of hope in God surfaces. It's a very strange feeling. Maybe it's a form of denial but I can't be sure. What I'm certainly grappling with is that my daddy - a fit, health-orientated man who has not smoked or drunk a day in his life - has just been doomed to a very dangerous illness.

Most of all, though I like to be positive, the thought of you not having Kung-Kung to play and hang out with for long depresses me. For now, however, all we can do is listen out for more details, give Kung-Kung the support he needs, and lift him up to the Lord.

Month #29: The Beginning of a Love Affair for Song & Dance

Dear Aidan,

This has been an interesting month for Mama and Papa. And you. After a visit by Aunty Mei Yoong, Uncle Daniel and little Gabby from KL, we were slightly confident you might be able to sit still long enough to watch...a musical.  So Papa bought tickets to the Lion King musical, the broadway version from London, for - not two - but three. Yup, buddy, we took you to the Marina Bay Sands theatre and guess what: you sat through the show. All 2.5 hours of it.

We were right up the front row, so the experience was probably quite in-your-face. Your interest was obvious as you asked questions and helped narrate the story throughout the musical, "That's the mean lion?", "Oh! He pushed Mufasa off!", "That one is Simba!", "Simba is sad cos his Papa is dead!". In fact, you got the attention of the viewers sitting around us with your chatter. We had to apologise for the noise, of course. But fortunately, they were gracious and said that it was nice to see such excitement in such a 'little one' (that's you, honey).

Sounds like...Bollywood music

After that event, you started to show a bigger interest in Papa's i-pod and headphones, as well as a new one in moving your body. One Sunday afternoon, Papa turned on some dub-step music on our player, and you practically leaped off the sofa to dance to it. Frankly,  we were surprised at how you naturally moved to the beat. It was funny to see.

Two weekends ago, we packed a picnic for breakfast and went to the Botanical Gardens with Seng Jinn who has become our housemate. In case you've forgotten, Seng Jinn is Papa's colleague and friend. He's also a handy babysitter although we've only enlisted his aid for the extremely long Easter Vigil service last March.

Yay, after this, we kick a ball and maybe chase a few birds, yes?

We also managed to squeeze in a visit to the Jurong Bird Park last weekend (yup, busy month!). Bolstered by your ability to sit still for a show, we made sure we didn't just looked at birds but caught the shows, too. You quite enjoyed them, especially the one featuring desert hawks and owls. This probably had to do with the fact that the bird-trainers turned up in Arabian costumes and rode grandly into the grassy arena on horses.

Aidan: "Where's the horse, Papa? The horse?"
Papa: "Honey, this is a bird show at a bird park...

This month, Kung-Kung and Poh-Poh also visited us (finally). They didn't stay with us though as they preferred the flexibility of a hotel. But during that week, they spent half a day at our place and Poh-Poh even cooked a meal or two for us all.

C'mon, Dillon. We got mischief to make here

One evening, Uncle Khin brought them to our place after they'd spent the morning at his home. Your cousin Dillon came along, too.

Usually, he keeps to himself as he's quite precious about his toys and needs time to warm up (well, he's probably wary of how jumpy and nosy you are too, heh heh). But this time round, he got curious when he saw you and Mama playing 'Monsters and Saviours' in the Ikea tent we got you.

Don't mind us, we're just annoying each other

Soon, he and Uncle Khin were the monsters and we had to defend ourselves in our 'cave'.

By the time Uncle Khin and Mama got home from taking away dinner at the food court nearby, you were both nutting it out together and having a grand old laugh.

This was really nice to see. :)

Who cares about rhythm, this is just for thumping

Before they left for home, Kung-Kung and Poh-Poh wanted to get you a present. After dinner one night at a lovely Teochew restaurant in Takashimaya, we walked to a toy shop and though you practically went cross-eyed seeing all the toys there, you chose a mini drum set.

Could your genetic predisposition to music be showing, thanks to Papa? Time will tell. Frankly, however, Mama is all for you to develop a passion in music and if you ever wanted it to be your career, you have both Papa's and Mama's blessings.

It's a lot more fun than law and medicine, that's for sure!

Kung-Kung...Poh-Poh, save me. Mama Monster is coming to eat me!

Two weeks after Kung-Kung and Poh-Poh left, we flew back to KL to stay with them. You're really getting close to Kung-Kung and would always be game to let him carry you even though it's something you don't really like these days (unless it's Papa or Mama). I guess he gets down and dirty with you when it comes to play-time. He always takes you for a ride around the suburb just so you can go over a few humps. And he always, always parts with the coins you need for those coin-operated rides at the mall.

I think I'm ready to get off now. Slow day, today!

On the potty-training front, we're nowhere near the Victory mark when it comes to business #2. Sigh. You managed to poo into the toilet bowl once. Just once. And even then, it was because you didn't know what was happening when Mama grabbed you, pulled off your pants, and set you down on the baby toilet seat! Yup, the lovely pink one you personally chose at the store. Even the promise of a treat isn't convincing you. So I guess you'll only be ready when - I don't know - when you're 10?

For books, Mama decided to scour the Popular Bookstore (nice name, huh?) at Heartland Mall which seems to have a slew of affordable books for pre-schoolers as well as Level 1 and 2 readers. I got you one entitled Adventures by the Sea. You've been asking Mama for at least 3 re-reads ever since we started reading it together.

The naughty seagull snatches Emma's ice-cream!

Feeding you has continuously been challenging. You'd insist on eating yourself until the reality of vegetables strewn all over your rice or noodles set in. And then it'd be a journey in slow-mo to the end of your meal with delays contributed by a multitude of excuses and the storing of food in your mouth. The other day, Papa decided to take over the feeding from Mama and I have to tell you what I overheard:

Papa: What? That's such a small bite. Are you a boy or a squirrel?
You: Squirrel!

I guess you are.

Funny and Helpful Month #28

Dear Aidan,

Eat, Papa! Eat!

Every one has a different language of love. Looks like yours is service. You look forward to - no, insist on - feeding Papa and Mama these days. Sometimes, you try to take over vacuuming duties. Mopping up spilt gravy and milk on the table is no problemo with you. And hey, what's the big deal with getting Mama's her water bottle for her? This all works out fine for me, honey. Although some days it does get messy when you end up spreading the spill over a wider perimeter than it originally was.

I'm busy building homes!

You're now able to sit down and focus on one toy for longer. Some days you spend 30-45 minutes designing your own train tracks (read: refuse to follow the instruction slip) and taking little toy trains and cars around it. Your block buildings are also getting taller and more abstract (read: refuse to consider stability). And you're invested in the poster colours Mama got you to experiment with them (read: refuse to draw in the traditional sense).

You're also becoming pretty good with a ball, kicking with more precision and power than we thought you had.

Let's see wot my hands can make...

I've so many of these things!

Last weekend, we flew home to KL to visit Grandpa, Grandma, Kung-Kung and Poh-Poh as it was Father's Day weekend. Uncle Brian invited us to his new home in Setia Eco Park for dinner. It's a lovely house with a park and pond nearby. You've always been a bit wary of Uncle Brian because he likes to pinch your cheeks. But on this visit, you allowed him to hold your hand and show you the ducks by the pond. At one point, Fraulein, his dog escaped from her leash and we all had to help catch her. You had fun trying to corner her.

Time to kick a ball around, guys

Are we having those for dinner, Uncle Brian?

Hmm, I would have that but I'm stuffed

Later, Aunty Angeline's parents dropped by the house, and we all had a lovely dinner together.

There was a lot of good food - all cooked by Angeline, her mum, Grandma as well as Angeline's cousin, of course. And there were lots of chatter and laughter, too. You couldn't stop eating papadums and grapes all night.






Mama has started spending short bursts of 10 minutes twice a day to stimulate your brain. It's not about turning you into a genius, but taking advantage of how spongy your brains are at this age. That's why I've decided to - at the very least - expose you to alphabet and number recognition plus word-recall. For example, with the recent trip to the zoo, we're now recalling together words like meerkat, cheetah, zebra, giraffe and rhinoceros. You're having fun mispronouncing rhinoceros, of course, but I don't think they'll mind :)

With all the activities in your life now - from playing football in the field, to swinging around on the climbing frame in the playground, to playschool and weekend visits to the zoo and Botanical Gardens, falling asleep randomly in places outside your bedroom has become a neat trick of yours. Sometimes, you're accompanied by Papa, who has a talent for falling asleep on demand.

Aidan: Waterfalls of milk falling into my mouth...
Papa: Kylie Minogue singing a lullaby to me...

This month, you decided that Papaya is not on your friendly fruit list. You liked it for 2 whole weeks when we lived with Kung-Kung and Poh-Poh. Maybe you overdosed on it because once we got to Singapore, you didn't even want to look at it. You've been quite sporting though, giving minimum resistance and putting an effort into eating it when Mama coaxes you to.

I'm letting this stuff slide down my throat

Meanwhile, more funny quips have been rolling off your tiny little tongue recently. Here's another gem: 

Mama: Aidan, do you play with your friends in school?
Aidan: Yes.
Mama: Are you sometimes scared to? It's okay if you are.

Aidan: No...Aidan only scared of the security guard at the playground coz...coz he scold Aidan when Aidan is naughty

There's a book called Here's Tumpty and Goodnight Tiptoe by Polly Dunbar that Mama bought at a book fair for you. You seem to like looking for Tumpty the Elephant who runs off to hide after being made fun of by his friends. I mean, you get such a kick out of finding him before his friends do in the story.

Tumpty the favourite elephant of the month

I get it: Mama reads this when I don't feel like sleeping!

In fact, you like it so much, you've been asking Mama to read it over and over again until it's past your bedtime. The best part? Mama gets duped into doing it, too. I mean, look at how well you sing the Our Father prayer!

Mr. Grumps at the Zoo & Other Places

Dear Aidan,

Phew. I never thought I'd survive the last month. But here I am again. Logging in a post. Still in one piece and breathing.

Your mama is not being dramatic either.

The last month has been all about taming tantrums. I'm not sure you'll ever remember getting smacked on the bottom by the feather duster. But yes, I introduced the rotan last month, a month that'll go down in my history as a mother as the toughest month with you yet. Tough not only because you were physically defiant almost everyday, but also because inflicting pain on a child is not something parents enjoy.

Fear-mongering is sometimes acceptable

I'm sure some modern parenting experts will chastise me for resorting to physical punishment. I mean, I've READ enough books to decide that every child is different, and every parent knows his or her child the best to apply what's necessary. So I'll stand my ground because with strong-willed kids like you who test harder, firmness, warnings,  and counting down to the Time-Out Corner do not always work.

Seeking knowledge about you is another way Mama loves you

Instead, I've found that first hitting the table to jolt you out of your funk appropriately alerts you to how serious Mama is about what's coming if you don't cooperate. I've also found that you have on occasions, risked pain to find out what exactly that is. And so now you know the answer. In fact, you remember it so well that these days, just a glance at the feathery stick on the wall helps prevent situations from going out of control for the both of us.

The boy who wanted to go to the zoo
to play with his toy car

"Ok, I've seen the white tiger. Next!"

This is not to say that you've completely stopped acting up (although to your credit, you haven't yet performed the helicopter-blade-spin on the floor of a mall just yet). Your mood this month is still volatile. For instance, the mention of visiting the zoo would light you up. But when we got there, you'd get all disagreeable and grumpy. Our first trip didn't go too well, actually. Upon arriving, you decided to lurk a couple of feet behind us before plonking yourself on the wooden slats on the ground to play with your toy car. Papa and Mama decided to leave you alone as there's really no point forcing you to like something when (1) you maybe don't (2) you're not in the right frame of mind to be positive about anything.

"Eh, where are the coin-operated rides, Papa?"

"Oh, look, a leopard! Ok, let's go home"

The sight of the white Siberian tiger excited you for all of 1 minute. The birds were annoying. The monkeys and meerkats were boring. The leopard woke up from his nap and looked up at you and you were flattered for a moment. You skipped zebras to whizz past the giraffes. And finally clamoured to go home even though Mama wanted to see the rhinos. Yup, I think Mama and Papa were more interested in the Zoo than you.

"Now, this is more fun than staring at a bunch of sleepy animals!"

You're not into TV but some programmes are tolerable, it seems. Like Pororo the little penguin, Mickey Mouse Fun Club, and Fireman Sam. Not that you paid full attention to whole episodes.

"Don't understand a word they're saying, it's so deep!"

You're beginning to appreciate music so Papa's i-Pod and our DVD-cum-CD player are beginning to bear more of your paw-prints.

"Let's see how I can destroy this thing..."

Last weekend, we took a short trip to Batam Island with Aunty Su Yin and Uncle Neil, who by the way, live in Block #19 at Kovan Melody. In case you forget, Aunty Su Yin's Mama's cousin from Kung-Kung's side of the family and Uncle Neil is her husband.

"Guys, the armchair looks odd here, so let me fix it for you..."

The ferry ride was fun for you and when we got to the resort, you decided you liked the room except for the layout. How do I know this? Well, the first thing you did was start moving the rattan armchairs about. You must have been very comfortable in your surroundings as most of the time, you didn't want to put on your clothes. The most you'd do was ear your shirt around your head. I suppose we could say you were creative.

"Now isn't it nice to be this close to Nature?"

"I think the telly's not switched on but it's just a theory"

Mama knows you don't like vegetables, meat or egg all that much but this month, you've been a bit more vocal about your feelings toward them. I suppose being chatty helps. Here's your first funny conversation with Mama over your dislikes. Basically, Mama was about to spoon some rice mixed with bits of vegies, chicken and fried egg into your mouth during dinner when this dialogue took place:

You: Aidan don't want vegies.
Mama: You have to eat some.
You: Aidan don't want that one...
Mama: Chicken? But there's so little here.
You: Aidan don't want egg also.
Mama: < death stare >
You: Aidan don't want Corner...

This month, Papa brought home The Earth Book by Todd Par. I'm not sure you're into the illustrations as they're stick figures style with quirky hair and bodies. It's a very colourful book though you aren't catching on to it at the moment. Poor Papa. He really likes buying you books but it appears your tastes are quite specific - animals are always good; and little children that remind you of yourself. Transportation vehicles work as well (which explains the Thomas the Tank Engine books) and some dramatic event - thunderstorm, lost child, late or naughty train, etc.

"It's not, you know, exciting enough..."

One day, we'll have to buy a bookshelf just for your books. But we're not complaining. We just hope your interest in books will last beyond the day you come home from school asking for a tablet.

Eskimo Boy & the Terrible 2s

Dear Aidan,

I've always told friends that the Terrible 2s for you began when you were 14-15 months old. I remember that you rather liked screeching in protest when we stopped you from taking or doing something. And how could Mama forget the flying paw that liked to hit out at me at the same time?

Anyway, looking back, THAT was mild.

It's month #26 now and 2 weeks into playschool, you started to metamorphose into a monster. The sort with a perennial ON button for temper and tantrums. You'd get off the school-bus with a smile for Mama. But once we got into the lift to our unit, you'd be (1) squirming and trying to dive off my arms because "Mama don't carry!" (2) raging because Mama's looking at you (3) pushing or kicking when I let you down inside the house because "No-o-o, I want Mama to carry me!"

Fickle? Yes. Unreasonable? For sure. Crazy? Sometimes I actually thought you were going nuts on me. Here's the clincher. Report from school? Teacher: Oh Aidan is adapting well. He's very obedient and quiet.

Right.

I've been on the receiving end of your general disdain for life for 2 weeks now. And I must say that it's been back-breaking! Suddenly, nothing is fun. And nothing Mama says is worth listening to. It's No to diaper changes, No to baths, No to naps, No to dinner, and No to teeth-brushing. But on the flipside, it's Yes to all the stuff you know you shouldn't be doing. Yes to throwing your toys onto the floor. Yes to pouring water onto the floor Yes to drawing on the walls, tables and, yes, the floor. Defiance is the order of the day. And defiance ends the day, too.

I actually called Papa up one evening in tears because I felt that maybe you simply hated Mama. I mean, deep down I know it can't be true. But boy, does it feel that way! Mama's theory is that you're reacting to the changes in your life, most especially playschool. And as it happens, playschool's unfamiliar territory so you put yourself on your best behaviour there, and find release at home. After all, who's the safest person you can be your ugliest to? (Not that you'll ever be ugly to me, of course.)

On the bright side, your passion for singing continues. And you do get a kick out of having an audience - namely, Papa and me. Maybe one day, we'll take you to a musical. But for that, we'll need to ensure you can sit still for at least 90 minutes. Right now, however, that seems like a slim chance.

It's also the month we explored letting you try slippers. They're not the safest things to do what you do best in - running around like a crazy lion. But they're comfortable in hot weather!  So Mama got you a pair of lime-green-brown ones from Bata.

Hello, slips, trips and accidents!

Ok, Bata's not exactly 5th Avenue. But I'll have you know that they're an institution when it comes to shoes. They've been around since Mama was 5 years old and maybe before that, too. In fact, there was one shop 2 doors away from Kung-Kung's typewriter repair shop when it was still in business a long, long time ago. He and Poh-Poh used to buy Uncle Khin's and Mama's school shoes from that branch.

Play-wise, you've really begun to take to the junior puzzles Mama got from Toys 'r' Us. They're 4-6 pieces and come in different varieties. Currently you're mastering the Elephant/Lion/Monkey and Ship/Airplane/Train Engine ones. You're more comfortable chatting in sentences now although you do omit conjunctions and adjectives. And some days, I'm surprised how much you try to say.

In terms of books, we've brought out another Thomas the Tank Engine one that Uncle Brian got you last Christmas. There's also My Dad by Anthony Brown. But for now, it looks like Thomas wins. Poor Papa.

Papa's reaction upon realising this book wasn't catching on